THE OBENSON REPORT

Covering Cinema From All Across The African Diaspora

Tuesday Link City

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Hurray for summers!


- A Few Tremors in Oprah-land - An article on Oprah's supposed dwindling audience.

- Dumb instinct - Sharon Stone says maybe the earthquake in China that's killed 60,000+ people is just "karma" for China's treatment of the Tibetans, which she is "not happy about."

- Former Cuban dictator Fidel Castro sort of endorses Barack Obama, calling him "the most progressive candidate to the U.S. presidency."

- "How Black Actors Are Written Out Of The Script" - One man wonders whether Spike Lee should be so concerned about Clint Eastwood's World War II films not having any black characters in them.

- A few words for independent filmmakers about the rapidly evolving distribution system: don't follow established patterns... don't play by studio rules.

- "If we are going to have a national cinema we have got to make stories which arise from our islands. What we do most of the time is make sub-American nonsense. The American template is very often lousy – why do we want to imitate it?" One UK filmmaker laments... although I'm sure these words could be spoken by mouths from other nations as well... imagine if every country adopted China's stance and limited the number of Hollywood films that landed on their shores, and instead strongly encouraged a local film industry.

- So what’s the truth behind those “Sex and the City” posters banned in Jerusalem? - I suddenly feel like yawning... but while we're on the subject...

- SCAMMED: A mega "Sex and the City" fan paid $19,000 on eBay for passes to the "Sex and the City" premiere and party in New York City tonight - but the tickets apparently never existed. Somehow, I don't feel sorry for her :o)

And that's news to me...

It's All About The Branding Baby!

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I stumbled across an interesting site called BrandChannel which lists all ad placement found within studio feature films, going back to 2001.

Something to pay attention to next time you sit down to watch a movie, and to discuss, when you and your pals go to Starbucks afterwards and order Frappuccinos, oblivious of the fact that you might be doing so because you saw one in the movie you just watched.

For example, in the 2002 hit Barbershop, BrandChannel states the following: By far one of the most brand heavy films we’ve covered. Yet almost no brand stuck out or seemed obtrusive. The only noticeable brand to continually re-appear was Miss Sixty, a jean and clothing maker that one of the film’s stars happened to endorse, which creates a bit of post-modern seamlessness.

Brands featured in Barbershop include the following: 360 Style, All, Bear Credit, Bentley, Big Daddy, Burger King, Cadillac, Cadillac Escalade, Chevrolet, Chicago Tribune, Chock Full O’Nuts, Cocoa Pebbles, Cristal, Dentyne, Durex, Ebony, Ecko Unltd, Fred Perry, FUBU, Gatorade, Gillette, Grape-Nuts, Hennessy, Herbalife, Honda, Huggies, Intl. House of Pancakes, Kodak, Krispy Kreme, Lucky Tiger, Lugz, Master Lock, Meoshe, Mercedes, Miss Sixty, MUG, Nilla, Now and Later, Oldsmobile, Oprah Winfrey, Oreo, Pelle Pelle, Pepsi, Planters, Pure Playaz, Range Rover, Red Lobster, Samuel Adams, Savoy, Sean John, SnackWells, Toyota, Triscuit, Tropicana, Us magazine, USA Today, USPS, and Viagra!

You can tell who the target audience of the film is, without even knowing what the film is about, or who is in it, just by looking at the brands featured in the film :o)

Or how about 2004's You Got Served? Featured brands include: Adidas, Aquafina, Cadillac, Casio, Converse, Ecko Unltd, Fiji, Girbaud, Jordan, K-Swiss, Mecca, Motorola, MTV, New Skool, Pepsi, Portland Trailblazers, Reebok, Schott, Shady, Sony, Tropicana.

Comparing the brands featured in the above 2 films, you'll notice some crossover - brands featured in both films (Cadillac, Ecko Unltd, Pepsi and Tropicana)... revealing of who the target audience is, companies and products that the filmmakers obviously thought would appeal to the target audience (a lot of clothing and shoe brands, which isn't very encouraging), and more. This is all useful info I think. I feel like so much analysis could be done with this data to reveal lots of interesting facts about the business and how audiences are mapped. It would be interesting to look at the box office totals of each film as well, and determine what the combination of that data with the branding data would tell us.

Check out BrandChannel. It's not a complete list of films, and it's not up to date, but there's enough there to keep you busy for now.

And now for my own featured branding...

Handango Inc.

Sydney Pollack Is Dead.

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According to the New York Times, Sydney Pollack, a Hollywood mainstay as director, producer and sometime actor whose star-laden movies like The Way We Were, Tootsie and The Firm, were among the most successful of the 1970s, '80s, and 90s, died on Monday evening at his home in Los Angeles.

He was 73. Cancer was the cause of death.

His work in front of the camera was just as impressive, prominently featured in the films of notable directors like Stanley Kubrick (Eyes Wide Shut), Woody Allen (Husbands & Wives), and Robert Altman (The Player). His most recent performance was in the critically acclaimed corporate thriller, Michael Clayton, alongside George Clooney.

I was a fan... and still am.

And The Awards Go To...

Posted on 12:27 PM comments (3)
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And now ladies and gents, below are the Cannes Film Festival award winners, as announced over the weekend. These are films to look out for in the coming year at your local theatre or video rental store (whether in the real or virtual world). Of special note is Afro-British filmmaker Steve McQueen winning the festival prize for best first feature, also known as the Camera d'Or, for his apparently impressive debut film titled Hunger, which was picked up for distribution by IFC Films. Also worth mentioning is the Mike Tyson documentary (titled simply Tyson) which also got picked up for distribution by Sony Pictures Classics, winning the "Knockout Prize" in the Un Certain Regard section of the festival:

IN COMPETITION
Palme d’Or: The Class (Dir. Laurent Cantet)
Runner-up (Grand Prix): Gomorra (Dir. Matteo Garrone)
Best Director (Prix de la Mise en Scene): Nuri Bilge Ceylan for Three Monkeys
Best Screenplay (Prix du Scenario): Jean Pierre and Luc Dardenne for Lorna’s Silence
Best First Feature (Camera d’Or): Hunger (Dir. Steve McQueen)
Jury Prize (Prix du Jury): Il Divo (Dir. Paolo Sorrentino)
Best Actor (Prix d’interpretation masculine): Benicio del Toro for Che
Best Actress (Prix d’interpretation feminine): Sandra Corveloni for Linha de Passe

UN CERTAIN REGARD
1st Prize: Tuplan (Dir. Sergey Dvortsevoy)
2nd Prize: Cloud 9 (Dir. Andreas Dresen)
Prize of Hope: Johnny Mad Dog (Dir. Jean-Stéphane Sauvaire)
Knockout Prize: Tyson (Dir. James Toback)
Jury Prize: Tokyo Sonata (Dir. Kiyoshi Kurosawa)

CINEFONDATION
1st Prize: Anthem (Dir. Elad Keidan)
2nd Prize: Forbach (Dir. Claire Burger)
3rd Prize: Stop (Dir. Jae-Ok Park) and Roadmarkers (Dir. Juho Kuosmanen)

Film Review - LES SAIGNANTES

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LES SAIGNANTES REVIEW

I really wanted to like Les Saignantes, the Cameroonian feature film by Jean-Pierre Bekolo (his 3rd effort), if only to acknowledge and commend a filmmaker for what must have been a challenging feat in simply making a film in a country where the production of film is still in its infancy, relative to celluloid factories like North America, Europe, Asia, and even Nigeria, Cameroon’s next door neighbor.

I really wanted to like Les Saignantes for the risks the filmmaker took with the entire production of the film – risks that helped contribute to a kind of film that I could only describe as ethereal.

I really wanted to like Les Saignantes, but, alas, I didn’t!

“I should have seen it with women instead of seeing it with you,” said the young lady I saw the film with, jovially but still with a matter-of-fact delivery.

Humored, I asked her to clarify, but had some inkling of what she meant.

“Because… it’s a film with feminist leanings… and women probably would appreciate it more than men.”

Feminist leanings?

On the contrary, as I told her, I thought it actually countered feminist doctrine.

The film is about 2 high-class prostitutes (they call themselves "Les Saignantes," or "The Bloodletters") in the year 2025, who use their sexuality to gain access to some of the highest ranking political officials in Cameroon, supposedly with the intent to rid the country of those corrupt men who have run Cameroon for decades, creating a rather dystopian society.


The idea presented, at least my interpretation of it, exalts the power of the “P,” and I’m sure I don’t have to clue anyone in as to what the “P” is. Essentially, the message we’re to garner from the film is that a woman’s sexuality is such a powerful thing that it can actually topple governments.

Now you’re probably thinking to yourselves, “well, it’s true Tambay – the power of the “P” is a genuine phenomenon!” :o)

And I wouldn’t entirely disagree with that. BUT just don’t tell me it’s an ideology that’s inline with feminist doctrine, because it's as anti-feminist a notion as I can think of. I’m not well-versed about all things feminist, but I’m confident in saying that a woman’s use of her body to break the will of men and achieve success in whatever she is pursuing, is counter to feminist teachings that champion the woman’s use of her intellect, rather than her body, to realize some end goal, helping to negate a culture of inbred widespread objectification of women!

So, no – I wouldn’t call this a film for feminists. I wouldn’t even say that it portrays women in the most idealistic frame – far from it! Sure, maybe you and “the girls” will have a good time laughing at the various sexual adventures the two protagonists get themselves tangled up in, usually at the expense of men, but to what end? You may as well wander down the aisle of the “black cinema section” at your local Blockbuster Video rental store and take your pick of any of the trollops on display!

HOWEVER, of course, one cannot completely appreciate a film by passively consuming it, and only looking at its surface, especially a film from a filmmaker known for political satire.

So, what is Les Saignantes REALLY about, underneath all the gratuitous T&A packaging?

It’s a criticism of the rampant corruption in Cameroon, from the top to the bottom of the pyramid, and the idea that women will be the sex that saves and revives the country from its depression – a theme that’s common in a lot of African cinema, notably films by the late Ousmane Sembene and Desire Ecare, 2 of the more internationally recognizable African filmmakers, and both male.

Women are often the protagonists, portrayed as progressive, as well as the higher moral and intellectual authority. Men are frequently framed in rather unattractive portrayals – often as corrupt, sexist, stubborn or simpletons… not very complex at all. Essentially, the films believe in the idea that woman is the future of man, as the idiom goes.


Les Saignantes seems to want to continue this trend, but the resulting delivery is worse than anything Sembene or Ecare ever did, or would ever do! There’s no comparison here. It plays like a notch or two above your archetypal Nollywood film, right down to the shoddy technical work, sub par acting, and an overall tackiness to it all!

It’s billed as a sci-fi film, but there’s very little sci-fi content, other than the fact that it takes place in 2025.

“Shouldn’t we give this film a pass, or at least NOT look at it with the same lens that we watch American films with their mega-budgets and pyrotechnics?” she asked.

I certainly didn’t walk into the theatre expecting a technically sound, high-production-valued film. Although even as I sit here thinking about my previous sentence, I wonder if there’s something condescending about that statement, because I feel like I should go into any film expecting the best from the filmmaker, especially a filmmaker like Jean-Pierre Bekolo, who has already made 2 features, with Les Saignantes being his 3rd, all with international festival play, as well as awards, and a filmmaker who received film school training and who also taught film at 3 American universities. If anything, I think expecting more from this film and the filmmaker is complementary, given his professional history. So, I believe that I actually would be insulting the man by agreeing to give his film a pass simply because he’s Cameroonian, and the film was produced entirely in Cameroon, on a minuscule budget, with local talent.


I’ve seen his first film, Quartier Mozart, and it’s a far better effort than Les Saignantes is. Besides, thinking globally, maybe it’s time that we (Africans from all across the Diaspora, all corners of the world) should stop giving ourselves “passes” just for effort, and start expecting a lot more out of each other!

“You must have liked SOMETHING about it!” she proclaimed, emphatically.

As I started out saying, I commend the filmmaker for taking some risks with the production – mostly stylistic. Some worked; others failed. But I always appreciate any artist fearless enough to charge down new paths, even if the end result isn’t desirable. So, Bekolo certainly should be given a round of applause for the effort. The entire film takes place at night, within smoky, foggy locales, dark side streets, and dimly-lit interiors, combined with a soundtrack comprised of an eclectic musical mix – what I would describe as an amalgamation of dancehall and makossa, but all uniquely African. All of this helped create an ethereal quality to the film that I liked, and still remember. It’s just too bad that the cumulative experience left me rather indifferent to it all.

“I think I’ll see it again, but with women next time, since you’re such a killjoy and obviously don’t see the true meaning of the film.” She said finally, before we moved on to other topics.

Ok, you do that! :o)


For those interested in better African films with similar messages, do yourself a favor and check out all of Ousmane Sembene’s films (from Black Girl to Moolaadé), as well as Desire Ecare’s Faces of Women.

I’d give Les Saignantes 2 stars out of a possible 5.

Friday Links - Happy Weekend!

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- Russian Communist party members condemned the new Indiana Jones' film on Friday as crude anti-Soviet propaganda that distorted history and called for it to be banned from Russian screens. Something to think about when you're sitting in the theatre this weekend, with a tub of lard and sugar in your lap, watching the 4th installment of the Indiana Jones series.

- "The Americans are lazy, they're arrogant and too scared to do any deals. I tell them: get some balls, your companies are all going down the toilet, maybe now's the time to get some films before it all collapses." As the Cannes Film festival winds down, U.S. distributors have been rather passive in the acquisitions department, scaring others.

- A Pac-Man movie is in development! No, this isn't a joke! It sounds almost as ridiculous as a Tetris movie... oh wait, actually, there already is a Tetris movie on schedule.

- Why both Variety and The Hollywood Reporter TOTALLY SUCK! The war between old and new media content creators spills over into the film industry, as a crop of mostly young bloggers like myself, fight for respect!

- Catch up on the great ones at Senses Of Cinema's critical "Great Directors" series, a rather thoughtful online journal with lots of quality articles on many aspects of cinema.

- I will be seeing the film below tomorrow night at the ongoing African Film Festival here in New York. It's played at a number of international film festivals to mostly critical acclaim, and comes highly recommended from trusted sources. I'm looking forward to it, specifically because the filmmaker is Cameroonian, as am I. I'll post a review after I see it!

Sony Picture Classics Gets Tyson At Cannes

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A few days ago I posted an entry detailing the overwhelmingly positive reaction to the James Toback directed Mike Tyson documentary at this year's Cannes Film Festival, where the former heavyweight boxing champ himself was present to enjoy the accolades first-hand. You can read that post HERE.

At the time, the film was without a distribution deal, or at least, none had been announced... until today!

The Hollywood Reporter reports that Sony Pictures Classics is in final negotiations for the documentary, which chronicles the "illustrious but often troubled life of former heavyweight champion Mike Tyson," calling it "one of the most high-profile domestic pickups among the Festival de Cannes premieres."

I had no idea it was considered a high-profile affair!

Apparently, Toback, who self-funded the project, had a tentative distribution agreement with Yari Film Group which never materialized due to disagreements with the deal. According to the Reporter, "The director was determined to leave Cannes with a deal, he said, in order to showcase the film in the early fall festival circuit before a release timed around the November elections."

I'm wondering why he wants a release timed specifically around the November elections... guess we'll find out eventually, now that the film will see a theatrical release.

Watch Viola Davis And Andre Braugher On Monday Night!

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If you live in New York City like I do, then you've probably seen the wealth of posters plastered in parts of Manhattan, advertising the upcoming A&E TV 2-night premiere event, beginning on Memorial Day, for a film called The Andromeda Strain, a sci-fi miniseries, based on Michael Crichton's 1969 novel of the same name, about a team of scientists who investigate a deadly disease of extraterrestrial origin.

As I walked through Grand Central Terminal today, down the wide path linking the Times Square shuttle platform and the 4/5/6 subway train lines, I couldn't help but notice the large posters covering almost every single wall I passed along the way, advertising the film, while showcasing it's diverse cast of characters - a cast that instantly got my attention, because it features two talented African American actors I always enjoy watching, but very rarely get to see perform - Viola Davis and Andre Braugher. And it is mostly thanks to those 2 names that I will be tuning in next week to watch the miniseries, as each is prominently featured.

The series is produced by the Scott brothers, Ridley and Tony, responsible for more than a few critical and commercial studio successes over the last 30 years.

Made up of 2 two-hour episodes, it will premiere on Monday night, May 26th, at 9PM.

It's already been shown in the UK.

Check out the website HERE.

See the trailer and behind the scenes clips below.




Charles Burnett Directs Eriq La Salle And Cicely Tyson

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With his Namibia epic behind him - a film that still is without an American distributor, and which I've heard mixed reviews about - Killer of Sheep director, Charles Burnett, has signed on to direct a film for the Hallmark cable TV channel, titled Relative Stranger.

The film stars former ER star Eriq La Salle, the timeless Cicely Tyson, and the usually dependable, Michael Beach.

In the Hallmark Channel original movie, La Salle plays an angry man who abandoned his wife, children and extended family six years ago. When his father dies, he returns to get what his dad left to him and reunites with his family in the process.

Tyson plays La Salle's mom, and Beach plays his brother.

Charles Burnett is directing from a script by Eric Haywood. Principal photography began this week and is targeted to premiere around the Christmas holidays.

In the meantime, check out the trailer below for Burnett's Namibia: The Struggle For Liberation, which stars Danny Glover and Carl Lumbly, amongst many others.

"W" - 2008's Sleeper?

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Man, this is really shaping up to be a must see film for 2008!

According to The Hollywood Reporter, Richard Dreyfuss is in final negotiations to play Vice President Dick Cheney in Oliver Stone's upcoming George W Bush pic, simply titled, W.

I previously posted a blog entry about the film over HERE and provided a glimpse of what some of the cast will look like in full make-up, over HERE.

Dreyfuss is yet another interesting casting selection by Stone - adding to an already brow-raising potpourri of stars attached to the film, including, Josh Brolin as George W, Elizabeth Banks as Laura, Thandie Newton (where has she been) as Condoleezza Rice, and Jeffrey Wright as Colin Powell.

Given the casting, as well as all I've read about Stone's possible caustic yet comical take on George W, I can't help but be giddy about what the end product is going to look, sound and feel like!

Looking forward to its fall release!

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Thursday Linkage...

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A few quick links to keep you busy in the meantime...

- MANOHLA DARGIS of the New York Times asks, "Is There A Real Woman In This Multiplex?", lamenting the lack of women in lead roles during Hollywood's summer blockbuster season.

- "I watch Clinton and feel kind of sorry for her and wonder, 'What are all these people telling her to run away for?'"Clint Eastwood Offers Pity For Hilary Clinton.

- IFC Films picks up 'Hunger' at Cannes... One of few films (if not the only one) directed by a black filmmaker, in competition at the festival. (Thanks to Sergio for the info).

- Reviews of Soderbergh's 4 1/2 hour biopic, Che, starring Benicio Del Toro, are coming in, after yesterday's screening at Cannes. VARIETY says it's not very good (Thanks to Sergio for the link); Cinematical says it's brilliant, and Benicio should win the Oscar for best actor next year.


- Indiana Jones 4 on Over 9,500 Screens!, set to break box office records.

- Jake Gyllenhaal crowned 'Prince of Persia' - a bit of casting news that's causing somewhat of a stir over the airwaves since Gyllenhaal isn't from the region (essentially modern day Iran!) nor does he look like he is. I suppose it'll be Gyllenhaal in "brown face," borrowing a page from the Angelina Jolie casting as Mariane Pearl.

More later...

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Bollywood & Hollywood - A Fledgling Love Story

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Interesting informative piece from the UK's Guardian, on Bollywood's aggressive global moves, with Hollywood at its side, thanks to the bottomless pockets of Indian billionaire, Anil Ambani, brother of Mukesh Ambani whom I profiled briefly on this blog, specifically concerning his $2 Billion pad (the most expensive home ever built to date) in Mumbai. You can re-read that blog entry HERE.

Anil Ambani and his Reliance Big Entertainment, the media arm of his Indian conglomerate, announced that the company would be funding and producing 10 Hollywood movies for a billion dollars! That's about $100 Million per movie!! Wow! The man isn't messing around is he?

Deals have apparently already been signed with the production companies of Hollywood stars like Nicolas Cage, Jim Carrey, George Clooney, Tom Hanks and Brad Pitt.

The goal?

"The aim is to look at 30 film scripts under this deal over the next two years, out of which 10 will go to screen. This is just the beginning of our relationship with Hollywood... We are looking to make big-budget, live-action movies in Hollywood that make money for us... That will mean a different way of making movies... We want to make Hollywood movies that have a global audience. We are not inserting Bollywood into Hollywood just yet..." said, Rajesh Sawhney, the president of Reliance.

The move also opens the door for Indian directors to work in Hollywood!

I'm wondering if there's a lesson that can be learned here... I love the aggressiveness of this by Ambani. Granted he's obviously got the money, but some of "us" aren't doing too badly either. Ownership and control are key in this business, and by putting up the money to fund the agreement (as opposed to relying on the bank accounts of others - see Robert Johnson and Our Stories Films Inc), Ambani and his company will be able to retain ownership, control and thus influence, all things that one could say we are lacking within the realm of black cinema.

You can read the entire piece HERE, where you'll also learn about the 2 Will Smith flicks that will be funded and produced by another Indian media company!

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Wednesday Link City

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- Spike Lee gets critical, ripping Coens for their treatment of death in their films, and Eastwood for his omission of black faces in his two Iwo Jima films - HERE and HERE.
- "It's too early to make a judgment call about Cannes' 61st, but no film is blowing audiences out of the water." - IndieWire claims no one is impressed by Cannes 2008 HERE.
- Be very afraid... comedian Eddie Griffin to get his own reality TV series on VH1 titled, Eddie Griffin Going For Broke. Given VH1's track record with reality tv shows (especially those with black faces), I have absolutely no hopes that this will do anything to turn the tide - more HERE.
- The world's "worst filmmaker" wants to make a film about the Janjaweed of Sudan - HERE.
- Somebody at Columbia Pictures must have been reading this blog because a Flash Gordon remake is in the works - HERE.
- From Cracked.com, 5 Upcoming Comic Book Movies That Must Be Stopped and why (John Singleton's Luke Cage is one of them) - HERE.
- World's richest man endorses Obama for president - HERE.
- Obama to Tennessee GOP: "Lay off my wife" - HERE.
- Why is Hillary still hanging on despite Obama's likely eventual win? She's posturing for the 2012 race - HERE.
- Microsoft CEO, Steve Balmer gets egged in Hungary - Video HERE.
- The worlds new tallest building - HERE.
- British medical professionals champion creation of human-animal embryos for disease research. Dr Moreau would be enthused - HERE.

And that's news to me...

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Spike Talks About "Miracle" And M.J. Documentary

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Today at the Cannes Film Festival, Spike Lee discussed his latest film, Miracle at St. Anna, with the press. Amongst several other topics, he mentioned his struggles in getting the film funded, stating that he had to finance the film with foreign money, since, apparently, there wasn't much interest from Hollywood studios, despite the fact that his last studio picture, Inside Man, was a box office success globally.

Read the press release below for more, and a teaser about an upcoming Michael Jordan documentary that Spike has in the works! Miracle at St. Anna hits theatres in October.

From IndieWire.com:

Director Spike Lee hit the Croisette Tuesday unveiling his latest project, "Miracle at St. Anna," based on a screenplay by James McBride, the author of the novel of the same name. The feature chronicles the story of four African-American soldiers who are members of the U.S. Army's all-black 92nd "Buffalo Soldier" division that fought against the fascists and Nazis during World War II. Lee is in Cannes to sell international rights to the film, which Touchstone will release in the United States.

"It's faithful to historic fact, but a large part of the film is about faith and miracles," said Lee about the film. "It's a miracle this film was ever made and it's a miracle that I'm a filmmaker." Lee, who describes "Miracle at St. Anna" as an "Italian film" - 95% of the crew were Italian and most of the movie was shot in Tuscany and Rome - lamented the Hollywood process, saying he had to go outside the studios to get the movie filmed. "It was like dangling a carrot in front of a horse. My film 'Inside Man' made $300 million and I thought it would be easier to get money for my next film [laughs], but that didn't happen... So I was discouraged with the Hollywood system, and decided to go to Italy." He was then able to get financing for the $40 million project.

Lee added, "There will be subtitles. We won't have Nazis speaking English, and Italians will be speaking Italian." Asked if the film touches on the subject of the mistreatment of African-Americans in the U.S. military during WWII, Lee said the film is not primarily focused on troop segregation, but does broach the topic...

... Lee will return to the United States for his next project, which he quickly mentioned as the discussion was concluding in Cannes. "Here's a scoop for you, I'm doing a feature-length documentary on Michael Jordan. And I'll be back next year [with it] in Cannes if we get in. And even if we don't, I'll screen it anyway..."

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Jean-Claude! What Have You Been Up To?

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The Muscles from Brussels, AKA Jean-Claude Van Damme (JCVD) has being virtually invisible since his glory days when films like Timecopwere box office hits, and American women melted in his presence, or at the sound of his "exotic" accent!

He's done several straight-to-video flicks since those days, none that I have seen, nor care to see, so you're probably wondering why I'm bothering to give the man screen space on this blog.

Well, JCVD has apparently resurfaced with what many are calling his most intriguing effort to date, and one that could resuscitate his once promising career - an action/comedy entitled, J.C.V.D. , starring JCVD as himself - as a washed-up 90s action star.

The synopsis: JCVD plays himself in this crime comedy that opens with the aging action star on the low end of his career, fighting a drug habit, his daughter's custody case and now a major P.R. problem -- for he's soon to find himself in the middle of a bank heist, with the world looking on and the Muscles From Brussels as the number one suspect.

The self-deprecating, yet also good-natured tone of the trailer below intrigues me somewhat. I admire any star (or former star) who's bold enough to make fun of/carricature themselves! Then again, maybe JCVD didn't really have much to lose anyway.

The film, J.C.V.D, will be released in parts of Europe, with no ETA on a USA release. It's being promoted heavily at the Cannes Film Festival this year, and from much of what I've read thus far, is creating mucho buzz!

Here's the international trailer...

Laurence Fishburne Is The Alchemist

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I didn't know Laurence Fisburne previously owned the rights to adapt the bestselling novel, The Alchemist, for the screen, and has apparently been sitting on the project for several years! Why? Fishburne had funding for the film with money from Abu Dhabi business men and a Japanese media company called the Kadokawa Group (I didn't realize Fish had connections like that). However, the deal went sour thanks to disagreements over the script, which increased the film's budget to $100 million! I guess the financiers said, "no thanks Fish. Too much loot!"

Well... riding in on his pale white horse to save the day is none other than jolly Harvey Weinstein, who has reportedly purchased the rights to the book from Fishburne, for a tidy $3 million sum, and hired an Oscar-winning screenwriter to pen an adapted screenplay, scrapping the version Fishburne already has written.

However, Fishburne will still remain on the project as the director and producer, as well as star in the film! I haven't read The Alchemist, although I've heard lots of wonderful things from those I know who have; but given that the story is about a young Spaniard who embarks on a quest to find a hidden treasure within the Egyptian pyramids, I don't think Fishburne will be assuming the lead role. So what character will he play, while also producing and directing the film? I guess I should go read the book now!

Read the rest of the story at Variety Magazine.

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Freeze That Poop!

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Watching the news on TV, this rainy New York morning, and was tickled by a commercial for a product called Poop Freeze for pets! The name says it all, I think. Initially, I thought it was a spoof of some kind, but soon realized that it wasn't.

What is Poop Freeze for pets? What the hell do you think?

The prose on the product's website says the following: You love your pet, but the messes they leave behind can be such a hassle! With laws requiring you to pick up after your dog, don't you wish there was an easier, more efficient way? Introducing Poop-Freeze™, the amazing pet product that every pet owner should have! With this revolutionary formula, all you do is spray your pet’s mess, wait 10 seconds for it to freeze and then pick it up and throw it away! Bring it with you when you take your dog for a walk, or keep it under the sink for when your pet has an "accident" in your house...

Just frost and toss :o)

Want some Poop Freeze of your own? Go to www.buypoopfreeze.com and order yours today for just $9.99 plus $6.99 shipping and handling. AND, as a BONUS for ordering today, you’ll get a second can of Poop-Freeze™ plus the Poop-Freeze™ Carry Tote, to hold your can of Poop-Freeze™! The commercial I initially saw is also on the site!

What are you waiting for?

Will Smith Is Off To "The Sticks"

Posted on 12:35 AM comments (9)
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France's highest-grossing movie to date is getting an American remake courtesy of Mr. Will Smith.

Courtesy of The Hollywood Reporter...

Warner Bros. has purchased the rights to remake a film titled, Bienvenue chez les Ch'tis, or, in English, "Welcome to the Sticks," with Will's Overbrook Entertainment to produce, and of course, Will to star in.

The original French film follows a postal employee from the sunny south of France who gets an unwanted transfer to the rain-soaked north, known as "the sticks," where he eventually is won over by "the locals' warm-hearted ways and impenetrable dialect."

The film opened in France, in February this year, and has gone on to break box-office records in the country, grossing more than $180 million to date, in France alone, and is said to be on its way to overtaking Titanicto become the highest-grossing movie ever released in the country!!

Will Smith stars in 2 films this year, Hancock and Seven Pounds, summer and fall releases, respectively, with many expecting Seven Pounds to garner him another Oscar nomination. I suppose this will follow the latter, likely for a 2009 release.

Below is the trailer for the French film. It's in French, but I think based on the above brief synopsis, and the overall tone of the trailer below, one can get a good idea of what Will's remake might look and feel like.

'Indiana Jones' Cannes Reviews - A Winner?

Posted on 11:39 AM comments (3)
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Over the weekend, critics at the ongoing Cannes Film Festival got a first look at the surefire summer blockbuster, Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, the 4th installment of the series, directed by Mr Spielberg himself, and co-written by George Lucas, scheduled to hit theatres this Friday; and now early reviews from those critics who attended the Cannes screening are in. Overall, they are mostly positive, as expected. From all I read, the consensus seems to be that despite a few minor "defects," there's more than enough in the film to thrill the average popcorn muncher!

Here’s are some reviews I've read thus far, courtesy of the Wall Street Journal:

Time magazine: “smart, robust, familiar.” Time
USA Today: “Even with the ponderous dialogue, it’s hard not to have fun on this adventure, and it’s good to see that Indy, though slightly weary, still has the goods.” USA Today
Entertainment Weekly says Harrison Ford is “terrific — and re-energized” but adds that the film “threatens at times to crumble under the weight of all the impersonal zigging and zagging loaded on for the sake of special effects.” Entertainment Weekly
Reuters: “Charmless.” Reuters
New York Post: “On a satisfaction scale, it lands squarely between ‘The Temple of Doom,’ and ‘The Last Crusade.’ ” NY Post
Los Angeles Times: “It avoids being an anticlimax and is entertaining in its own right.” LA Times

I plan to be there on Friday night with my $12, and will share my thoughts over the weekend!


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Tyson At Cannes

Posted on 9:35 AM comments (3)
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I had no idea!

A documentary on former heavyweight boxing champ, Mike Tyson, premiered at the currently ongoing Cannes Film Festival, and the man himself was present for the screening, and press frenzy that followed.

The documentary was made by filmmaker, James Toback, responsible for some lesser known films like 1999's Black & White, and 1997's Two Girls and a Guy. He also wrote the screenplay for Bugsy, likely his most well-known film, for which he was nominated for an Oscar, although he didn't direct it.

Interestingly, Toback financed the Tyson film himself. Obviously he must have really wanted to make it. According to an interview with the L.A. Times, he said that he was compelled to do the film about a man he's known for 23 years because "there is an ongoing sense of drama about him. He is a man of contradictions and complexities, able to surprise you moment by moment... a balance of fragility and rage."

The reviews for the documentary since the screening at Cannes last week, have been all strong, from those I've read. According to the L.A. Times, Toback said he was taken aback by the intense crowd reaction to the film when it was screened at Cannes on Friday night, calling it an overwhelming spectacle.

From The Hollywood Reporter review of the film: Tyson found Islam in prison; and he's been through rehabilitation. Now, he says, his anger is directed only toward himself. "I'm not an animal anymore," he says in his high-pitched lisp staring at the camera through a dramatic Maori facial tattoo.

The film is to be released in later this year, although I couldn't find any info on who its distributor is.

Here's a video clip of Tyson at the Cannes reception on Friday night.



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"Hancock" In Ratings Trouble?

Posted on 11:13 AM comments (5)
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Apparently, Will Smith's expected Summer blockbuster, Hancock, is facing somewhat of a battle with the MPAA ratings board. In order to make the film accessible to as wide an audience as possible, the filmmakers have struggled to get the film a PG13 rating from the MPAA. As is, it's an R-Rated film, which automatically reduces its reach.

According to an interview with the director of the film, Peter Berg, at the New York Times, Hancock "has remained surprisingly sexual, violent and true in spirit to an original script that was viewed as brilliant but unmakable." Obviously, not tame enough for the MPAA to award it a PG13 rating.

And now, there are reports that some of the cast, including Will Smith, were called back for reshoots of certain scenes in New York City, as recently as last weekend, which is incredible, when one considers that the film is scheduled to open about a month and a half from now. My guess is that the reshoots are to appease the MPAA and get that coveted PG13 rating!

Hancock hits theatres on July 2nd.

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Denzel, Bad... Tom Cruise, Good... In 28th Amendment

Posted on 10:38 AM comments (3)
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A week ago, I posted an entry on the first onscreen collaboration between Tom Cruise and Denzel Washington, titled The 28th Amendment, about a president who comes to find out that the United States is actually controlled by a super secret organization who will assassinate anyone who gets in its way. The president realizes his newfound information puts him at the top of the Assassination List.

At the time, there was no word on who would be the protagonist (the president) and who would play the antagonist (likely the head of the super secret organization). The good folks at Moviehole.net are reporting that Tom Cruise will play the President and Denzel will play the head of the super secret organization!

Interesting! I initially thought it would be the other way around. Tom Cruise is too short to be president ;o) I was also hoping for a possible foreshadowing of things to come in reality... Denzel as fictional black president... Obama in '08.

Interestingly, McCain is also rather short, at about 5ft 7inches, which is about how tall Tom Cruise is... hmmm... I smell a conspiracy :o)

However, it's worth noting that America's presidents, going all the way back to George Washington, have been overwhelming tall - at least 6ft.

But I digress...

Cruise will be the good guy president, and Denzel will be the baddie. I wonder if they'll have a fight scene. I'd like to see Tom take on Denzel. My money will be on Denzel though!

Ok, I'm done!


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See Robert Downey Jr Swearing Like A Black Man

Posted on 10:13 AM comments (3)
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For those who don't know, a "red band trailer" of a film is a trailer that does not adhere to MPAA guidelines for motion picture advertising for all audiences, meaning it will likely include foul language, violence, sexual, or otherwise "objectionable imagery" (Gotta protect the kids, right?). It's usually preceded by a red band, which reads "The following PREVIEW has been approved for RESTRICTED AUDIENCES ONLY by the Motion Picture Association of America."

Obviously, Tropic of Thunder is an R-rated film. Below is the red band trailer released just yesterday. We get to see Robert Downey Jr in black face and an afro, spitting out curse words like "muthafucka" in his best imitation of how us black men supposedly speak. The early buzz on this one is overwhelmingly positive, as fan-boys are drooling in anticipation of its release, which won't be until August.

Friday Funnies - Hillary's WV Constituency Speak

Posted on 12:41 PM comments (4)
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If I were Hillary, I wouldn't be so proud to know that these are the kinds of people who supported me to a win in the West Virginia democratic primary a few days ago. Sad, sad, sad... but rather humorous as well, hence the "Friday Funnies" tag! Thanks to Harry Allen for the link.


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Saw I, II, III, IV, V, VI... When Will It End?

Posted on 11:57 AM comments (8)
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I guess Lions Gate intends to give birth to as many of these freaking Saw movies as it can, and enjoy whatever little profits each sequel produces for them.

What I don't understand is why audiences continue to insist on seeing each preposterous sequel, encouraging Lions Gate to continue producing them.

These are the kinds of films that one would expect to see go straight to home video, but, because of how successful each has apparently been for the mini studio, they continue to enjoy theatrical releases as well.

The 5th installment of the series will be in theaters later this year, in time for Halloween. And I just heard that a 6th film will go into production this year, for a 2009 release. Should we expect a 7th and an 8th? Possibly! They've taken it this far, so, why not go even further.

URGHHH!!

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The Cleveland Show

Posted on 10:40 AM comments (6)
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We rarely get to see black people animated, and certainly not carrying an entire television series. Fat Albert is the first title that comes to mind when I think of prominent black cartoon characters, but the program existed more than 20 years ago. And of course there's Aaron McGruder's The Boondocks series. If anyone can think of others, specifically from the last 20 years, please share.

For the 2009 TV season, Fox TV will air The Cleveland Show, an animated TV series, and spin-off from the mildly popular Family Guy. The Cleveland Show will focus on the character of Cleveland Brown and his family. The story goes... Cleveland moves to Stoolbend, VA with his son, his high school sweetheart Donna and her daughter. Their wacky neighbors include a loudmouth redneck couple, a British family seemingly stuck in the Victorian era and a family of bears. I don't watch Family Guy, although I've seen pieces of episodes, so I really can't say what to expect from The Cleveland Show. The fact that the it's a comedy and the creators are white could be of some concern (I immediately think of the scene in Bamboozled, in which Delacroix creates the "Mantan Show," with a room full of white writers), but I'll wait until I actually see an episode before passing judgement. See the trailer below for more...

Thursday Linkage...

Posted on 11:23 AM comments (6)
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- Following Oprah's lead, pop culture icon Madonna plans to start building a multimillion-dollar girls' school in Malawi, the southeastern African republic. MORE HERE.
- Check out Cracked.com's humorous list of the "6 Worst Movies Hollywood Almost Made." Number 6 on the list was the planned 2001 remake of Dolemite, starring L.L. Cool J. READ ON HERE.
- A couple of lukewarm reviews of the Cannes opener, Blindness, starring Julianne Moore, Danny Glover and a laundry list of international stars, directed by Fernando Meirelles (City of God). The Weinsteins apparently might have some trouble selling this one to American audiences. Read the first one HERE, and the second review HERE.
- I'm giddy! Werner Herzog and David Lynch are teaming up to produce a film called "My Son, My Son," a horror-tinged murder drama based on a true story. I'm a fan of both auteurs, although a bigger fan of Herzog than Lynch (Inland Empire was tedious), and I'll probably always take notice when either of them creates something individually. How could I not be excited at the possibility of a collaboration. MORE HERE.
- CBS buys CNET in $1.8 billion deal. I use CNET occassionally, but I didn't realize it was worth that much loot! READ ON.
- Lastly, the world is indeed full of kooks. Here's one of them...

Curious George Obama

Posted on 9:47 PM No Comments
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Oh brother... shaking my head... Just watch the clip...

From The "Screw Your Poverty" File...

Posted on 3:46 PM No Comments
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How much is too much? Apparently, there is no such thing as too much to 48-year old Indian billionaire, Mukesh Ambani, the 6th richest person in the world (according to Forbes Magazine), with an estimated worth of $43 Billion!

I submit into evidence, Antilla, the Ambani family's future domicile, the worlds most expensive home, currently in construction in Mumbai, with a price tag of $2 Billion! Yes, a $2 Billion home. I didn't think such a thing was actually possible. I've seen sprawling centi-million dollar estates owned by Hollywood elite like the Spellings, and tech tycoons like Bill Gates, but Antilla trumps all of those by at least $1 Billion.

So, what does a $2 Billion home include? It's a 27-story skyscraper standing at 550 feet high with 400,000 square feet of interior space, no two floors are alike in either plans or materials used, a lobby with nine elevators, a large ballroom with 80% of its ceiling covered in crystal chandeliers, an ice room where residents and guests can escape the Mumbai heat to a cooled chamber dusted by man-made snow flurries, and the first 6 stories are just garages for their cars.

What does a $2 Billion home look like? Below is a draft by the premiere architects who designed the structure with the Ambani family.

Here's a video clip India's CNN:


Wednesday Link City

Posted on 1:05 PM comments (2)
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The Cannes Film Festival got underway today. Lots of American films will be making their debut, including the opening night film, Blindness, by Brazilian director Fernando Meirelles (responsible for 2002's hit although over-rated City of God) starring Julianne Moore, Mark Ruffalo, and Danny Glover. Also premiering at the festival is Steven Sodebergh's 4 1/2 hour Che Guevara bio-pic, titled simply Che, starring Benico Del Toro. Yes, 4 1/2 hours! Although it's a favorite to win the Palmes d'Or. More on the festival HERE.

- Now Catholics everywhere can breathe easier because, after much discussion and analysis, the Vatican has reached the conclusion that it's perfectly OK to believe in aliens, and doing so "does not contradict a faith in God." Well, thank GOD for that! More HERE.

- Did you hear the one about the white valedictorian at a historically black men's college? Well, it's true. Read about "a different kind of 'Morehouse Man'" HERE.

- An interesting piece comparing the size of restaurant food portions, 20 years ago and today. Take the "Portion Distortion" test provided by the Department of Health HERE.

- I'm sure everyone has already seen Bill O'Reilly's rampage on Inside Edition. If you haven't, here it is, preceded by Keith Olbermann's color commentary. HI-LA-RI-OUS!!!! How can anyone work with this dude?? Sheesh!


That's all for now folks!

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I Am Become Death, The Destroyer Of Worlds

Posted on 10:14 AM comments (2)
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As if the 100,000+ killed by a cyclone in Myanmar wasn't heart-wrenching enough, 2 weeks later, another Asian territory is coping with tragedy and loss also caused by a naturally occuring disaster - this time an earthquake in China, with over 12,000 killed, and more than 18,000 still buried underneath the rubble, which means that the death toll could reach 30,000+ if those buried bodies aren't recovered alive. 26,000 are reported to be severely injured.

To have disasters as destructive as these two happen within close proximity in terms of physical space and time, is truly sublime!

What does it all mean, if anything at all? Surely those of us still standing are meant to learn something from this.

There really are no words sufficient... except maybe, always remember... It all ends eventually.

Peace.

Weekend Recap - An FYI And 2 Film Reviews...

Posted on 10:33 AM comments (5)
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THE FYI

Blog postings will be erratic for the next 3 weeks! I've got a writing deadline to meet at the end of this month, and need to focus intently.

So, hang in there with me. I'll post as I can, when I can.

In the meantime...

THE 2 FILM REVIEWS

I saw Mister Lonely on Saturday night, and Redbelt on Sunday afternoon.

In brief...

Mister Lonely - Genuinely interesting idea for a film, visually rich, mostly well-acted, BUT weak story-telling, unnecessarily pretentious, and longer than it really should have been. Harmony Korine hasn't made a film in 9 years or so, after being labeled (or possibly mislabeled) by many as some kind of wunderkind filmmaker, with then arthouse acclaimed works, Gummo and Julien Donkey-Boy, and screenwriting work for controversial filmmaker/photographer Larry Clark - but this is a rather disappointing return to center-stage. While I found a few select moments to enjoy, mostly those with co-star Samantha Morton, the person I saw the film with almost walked out about half-way through. Worthy of a big screen viewing, if only to take in some of the more appealing visual compositions, and Samantha Morton's performance as an unstable Marilyn Monroe impersonator. Otherwise I'd wait for the DVD. However, if you're not a fan of Korine's, I'd avoid it altogether, unless you're interested in something a little out of the ordinary. Unfortunately, the trailer looks much more promising than the film turned out to be. See it below...

Redbelt - Chiwetel Ejiofor meets David Mamet and mixed martial arts with unflattering results for all 3. This should have gone straight to DVD! It's not bad, but worse than you'd expect given the talent involved. It's missing Mamet's trademark stylized dialogue, and doesn't quite earn the weight of the message that its ending wants us to walk away with. A little too methodical and predictable for me. Not what I'd call a "leading-man" creating role for Ejiofor; it's the kind of project I would expect to see Wesley Snipes in, not Ejiofor. But I'd say he did his best with what he was given to work with; however, certain peripheral performances were rather wooden, and in some cases laughable. Unless you're an Ejiofor disciple, or just want to support the man and his efforts, I'd say wait for the DVD, or even possibly, cable TV. You're not missing much here. If you must see a Mamet film, rent Glengarry Glen Ross or Wag the Dog instead. See trailer below as well.




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